Mrs Justa and the Fall

Fall, I think it is one of my favorite seasons of the year, that and spring. Fall brings fresh apples, peaches and hay . Fall reminds us that we can go outside and actually feel the refreshing air of temps in the 60s. The world in CNY becomes a pastel oil painting with yellows and reds, oranges, greens and browns splashed everywhere you turn.

Fall means apple cider, and out door camp fires, pumpkins carved out and the knowledge of colder days to come. Fall is a sign of an ending of another year. Fall means Halloween, walking in crisp leave piles, putting away the summer yard ornaments and moving the holiday stuff closer to the shed door.

It is a time of cleansing to me, a time of starting over, saying this chapter in my life is turning to the last page and a new one is about to begin. It reminds me that I need to start thinking about Thanksgiving and having the plans start for a family meal.

Planning for special times at Christmas. I do not go nuts at Christmas, I try to do home made things, things from my heart and not a quick purchase to say it is done.

It is a time, that society has pushed the Christmas season too close to, merchants take so much of the fall season away from us, the stores seem to go from Halloween to Christmas- forget about Thanksgiving.

To me though, I treasure each day. I know not how many more Falls God will bless me with, I know not who I may never see again. I soak in the fall sunrises. Have you ever noticed them, the sky looks like a fall sky! The clod front clouds lining the horizon, making it clear that things are changing. Yes I love fall. Do take a moment and enjoy it too. For it comes quick and leaves quicker. Look for the colors, look for the field of golden crops, grab a pumpkin, and stop and smell the wood fires. Until later, Mrs Justa signing off.

43 Things Tags: Fall,seasons,crispness,God,blessings,Thanksgiving

mrs Justa sick of it all

43 Things Tags: money,wanting,spoiled,wasting time,politics

Through the fog what is left.  (photo is courtesy of adobe.)I wonder when the dust is cleared, the elections are over, the financial direction goes in what ever way it goes, what is left?
Will I be able to afford to drive to work? Will my small amount in my savings account be worthless? Will we be able to keep what we own, and what we owe on?

What is the future going to bring?
I am so tired of the talking on the cable news, on the talk radio, I am tired of people thinking the troubles of the world just happened. Look around you, look at your life, look at your environment, look at your family, your friends.

We all have more then we need , really, look at how little people  need really.

Some folks want the best car, the biggest house, the largest TV, the most channels, the IPODs , cell phones for everyone in the family, video games, internet, the most clothes, 200.00 bucks a week in groceries.

I am tired of the spending, the wasting. We need to stop and just really ask ourselves... what do we really NEED.

I am off, I am tired, and going to chill. Love to all, Mrs Justa 

Mrs Justa and nursing

Well the best of me has got the best of me! I just faxed out a resume, cover letter and application to a local hospital for being considered for a per diem position. I have to tell you, I am really excited about the possibility to get back into  a clinical setting again. I am still going to work full time in management at a local 3rd party administrator for self insured plans, and I do like that type of work.

My heart though has always been in patient care. I really love helping people and in a hospital setting, well people are at very trying times in their lives. I always tried to provide the best possible care, take time to explain what was happening and planned and to listen to the patients and their loved ones.

I went into nursing to support those without loved ones , those who were dying, I never wanted a patient I was caring for to die alone. I would stay a little late to be with them if needed.

I went into nursing to try to make the stress of a sudden illness a little easier for the patient.

So we will see, who knows if I will get the position or not. But I really hope that I do. Per diem means at this facility, that I would work every other weekend, 15 hrs minimum. It will be a good thing if I get it, I will unfortunately be away from home a little more, but I think I will feel better about myself if I get it.

Wish me luck. Love to all, Mrs Justa

43 Things Tags: nursing,health care,helping others

Mrs Justa cautioning the use of words.

..."the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. 6The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." James 3

Words hurt , words can not be taken back, words get molding into our psyche and comeback at us at various times. Words are something that no longer belong to us once we say them, they are directed at someone else. We can not pretend like they never came out, and no matter if we say we are sorry, the word is gone, imbedded in another person- or other peoples hearts, minds, souls.

Enough ugliness happens to individuals every day in this world, with out any of us creating a living wound made from words.

I say this as I listen to others in the stores, and how they talk to one another. I say it as I hear the political ads, and the attacks that each others speech writers make on the opponent.

The "talking heads" of cable TV talk shows. I say this as I come out of a doctors office and hear the receptionists talking, thinking no one can hear them. I say this for the children of the world who hear what is being said in their homes, but the parents do not think they do.

My personal life has been filled with hurtful words. And sometimes when I least expect it, a song, a place, a moment brings back the words, and they surface to the top, often I hear the voice and tone as if it was just being said now.

Oh I am not saying my whole life has been bad- no that is not it. But I have had many times where I was not the prettiest, the thinnest, the most nicely dressed, the smartest, the wealthiest, in a situation. Obesity has been a curse on me, I am not pretending not to have dealt with it my whole life. And I try to get over it and loose the zillion pounds I have, but I have never achieved it for very long, I know I am the only one to take care of it, I have lost 45 pounds, but I am holding there. But people are cruel, they must think obese people can not hear. In my life I have had people make oinking noises as I walk by, or say things that are insulting.Not recently, but that does not matter- because the words the noises, they are there, and can come out at any time.

So my request for everyone is think about the other person, what if you were them. And use your tongue for praises, for praying, for grace, for appreciation.. make this world a better place and just be kind.  Thank God for what you have, appreciate what you have been blessed with and find the goodness in life. Love, Mrs Justa

43 Things Tags: words,insults,fighting,blessing,appreciation

Mrs Justa and Friends

43 Things Tags: friends,life,love,real,memories

There are some thoughts on Friends that Paul Williams wrote-

" Friends are like good wine, And I've had the best; I don't always show it, But no one knows better than I..."

And that is so true. Mark and I have friends that are always there. Cherished and loved. They do not judge us, they just are there. We do not judge them, we just love knowing them.

We do not see our friends nearly enough, but when we do we always have a great time. We laugh, we share our thoughts, we tease each other and we create smiles imprinted in our minds that no one can take away.

"Friends love your good side and they live with your bad; Want you and need you when no one else knows you're alive." Wow, is that not true? This morning we had breakfast with some friends that have know Mark since high school.

They have to be the most genuine people I know. They are real, and even though I have not known them for as long as they have known Mark, they accept me in part of their friendship. I meant them in the late 1980s so I have known them for a while now. We always have a great time when we get together, and I never want the time to end. The nice thing is knowing that it will not be too long before we all get together again.

I have some friends that I have meant in nursing and I have one friend who I have known since 1963. It is weird because we work together now, and have on and off in the past 20 years. We went to nursing school together. I have a few more friends I meant at Crouse and one I meant in 1995 when I went into insurance review nursing. All these people are true friends to me. We do not hang out like people we know out of work, but we are close and really care about one another.

And we have some blogging friends. Their relationships are fairly new, but they too seem very sincere. They are real people, not afraid to put their feeling out for others to see. And that is so important, because peer relationships help others see that what they are experiencing is not unique.

To all the friends, thanks for being there. And be safe, take care of yourself. Love, Mrs Justa

So to our friends, we have not tons of friends, but we have true friends, thanks for being there. .

Mrs Justa and freedom of cares

43 Things Tags: freedom,frolic,joy,happiness,carefree

Can you say happy? Can you say in his glory? When was the last time you felt that way? When was the last time you found nothing but joy in your life? Indi was in pure, ultimate joy. He got to go "bye bye in the car" and got to go for a walk in the park, with the breeze coming off the lake, he brings a 3-D image of what "frolic" means. Look at that smile! You can almost feel his lightness as he pranced through the rich green grass.

Whoa, when was the last time I felt that free of any cares in the world. It is hard to say but I can not remember a time . Maybe when I learned to ride a bike and that moment my dad let go of the seat and I was free, wind blowing in my face and a step towards independence.

As a 10-13 year old, I road my bike all over the suburban track we liked in, I can remember letting go of the handle bar and balancing as I propelled down the roads. Not a care in the world, me, God and the breeze. Maybe that was when.

It is funny how the more independent I became, the more pressures came with it. Where to live, who to relate with, bills to pay, cars needed to get to the job I had to do. Balancing all the variables of life .

For indi- he will never have those stressors, he will always be like this. Smiling, romping, and being our best friend. He was so tired that night when the sun set and the day ended. He was tired from over joy.... we were tired from life.

May you have a free moment in life every once in awhile.. and smile a smile for Indi. Love Mrs Justa

Mrs Justa on time

43 Things Tags: time,friends,family,loss,treaured moments

" If I could save time in a bottle, this first thing that I'ld like to do, is to >>>" How would you finish that sentence? I am pondering this as I hear the tons of news reports going over the devastation from this most recent hurricane. And thinking of those who chose to stay behind, to challenge the storm, those whose lives may in danger, and I wonder what they would save if they could save time in a bottle.

Would it be the challenge of fighting a force much bigger then we are? Would it be special moments with a friend, a loved one, a moment , what would it be?

For me, I would save times of freedom from stress, I would save minutes with precious people that have passed on, I would save my sons laughter as a toddler and child, I would save cuddling him at night and reading to him. I would save the moment I met Mark, and the moment I meant my first husband, the moment I graduated from nursing school, watching my son graduate from high school, watching him and Adrianne graduate from college, Watching them both marry the love of their lives, the first time I held Brandon,sitting on my dads lap ( God I miss him so), my mom's wisdom, having good friends, feeling wanted. That would be what I would save in a bottle. How about you? My prayers that you treasure those special moments, Cindy

Mrs Justa and Mr Justa

43 Things Tags: llife,depression,Mark,Healing,improving

Don't look too quick, or you will miss him. Here he is. Mr Justa. This recliner has been his support, his comfort, his life for the majority of the past year and 2/3rds. He is trying to get better, trying to overcome the obstacles that life has in his path. Indi is always by his side, as he is in this shot. Indi is a good companion, although there are times when he can be a pest, wanting to play ball over and over again.

Mr Justa is coming out of the depression. He is beginning to see light instead of darkness. I AM THRILLED. I know it takes a long time to overcome the lowest part of depression, it hurts to watch someone go through it, and it is hard being a cheerleader to someone who can't believe what you are saying. But my cheering will continue, I will support him through this all, and I know things will continue to improve.

Life at the house is okay, Money is incredibly tight, but money is not everything. I had a doctors appointment this afternoon, so I took 1/2 a day off, and we tag teamed mowed after I got home. Mark uses the rider, I pushed around the parameter of the house, the shed and around the bushes that line the property line.

It took us about an hr, it was 70 degrees out, a slight breeze, it felt good and it looks great.

I want to thank everyone for their prayers and well wishes for Mark and his recovery. Without them  this would be much tougher. And I do believe soon, there may be more of MR Justa and less of me. Love to all, Mrs Justa.

Mrs Justa and the proverbial fruits

43 Things Tags: life,expectations,earning things

There is an old Greek Proverb " He who will have the fruit must climb the tree" (Courtesy of picasaweb.google.com)

That is so true. We must earn what we want out of life, work for it, Nothing should come easy. I see kids that have everything handed to them on a platter- and as they grow up, they expect for things to be handed to them. They expect that life owes them instead of that life is waiting for them to earn it.

I was in a management class a few months ago, and it was delineating the different generations and how the societal environment makes people different in their life and work ethics. Now I really HATE generalizing, and I know there are some people no matter what generation that do not fit the mold. The idea of the class was to show how we stereo type ages, and also that different generation groups are different in their expectations and their feelings of entitlement or appreciation.

I do find there is a difference. Again, it is not across the board. However, when I have worked with the 50-65 age group they are normally always on time, they tend to try hard to keep their job, they do not gripe about others and they are frugal.

The 30-40 age group are more computer savvy, carry themselves about differently, maybe even with more confidence, sometimes - and it may not be aware to them, but a sense of arrogance at times.

The 20-30 yr olds seem to have a little less understanding of how precious every minute is at work. You can catch them sneaking in text messages at times, chit chatting when work is piling up , sneaking in 5-15 minutes late, they are hard workers, when they are working, but sometimes seem to be lax.

I found this in various settings of where I have worked , where I shop or do business, and again it is not always, not everyone, but it is definitely apparent if you look for it. We all have to remember that life is not meant to be handed on a silver platter, and to appreciate something, it needs to be felt, earned, and a challenge to get.

Good luck in your endeavors, and until later, I am going to sign off and pick some proverbial fruits. Love, Mrs Justa

Mrs Justa feeling lost...

I feel like a lost soul on the cyberspace road way. Have I told ya that I sometimes HATE computers... well tonight is one of those nights. I came in to update our excel file of our expenses in the checking account and all is gone! It says it does not recognize the format or the program it was done on- yet it was done on this computer. I had it stored on a g drive- guess that was not a good idea. The fricken g drive ate my information.

So here we are faced with having to reenter all the info--- grrrr.

Hand written ledgers never did that. Yes, I feel like I am rambling on this path, not sure where I am headed, have no idea where all my stuff has gone, and feeling like there is  no end.

Kinda felt that way in the moving adventure a few months ago, I kept packing, and there was more to pack, more to move, more to reorganize. I swear I will NEVER move again. I am sure PR can relate to that right now!

Going around the kitchen still it is like where's Waldo trying to remember where I placed some item that is not often used.
I laugh at myself, as I open a cupboard to see if I chose the right door. It will probably take me another few months before I get it all straight.

Mark said he will help me with this excel nightmare this weekend, I am going to at least start reentering the info tonight. But I gotta tell ya, it is really yanking my chain! So as I stroll through the last 3 + months of check ledgers, think of me as I fumble through the seemingly endless path . Love to all, Mrs Justa. ( PS Mr Justa is coming along, a little at a time, he is here in spirit !)

43 Things Tags: lost,computers,dreading

Mrs Justa on abuse

43 Things Tags: abuse,harm,being blind,helping a child

"Somebody cries in the middle of the night
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate
When morning comes it'll be too late

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete angel

A statue stands in a shaded place
An angel girl with an upturned face
A name is written on a polished rock
A broken heart that the world forgot

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete angel" 

Today is dedicated to a little girl I do not know,

a little girl that the news clips say was murdered. A homicide they say. This song I have sung in karaoke bars, Martina McBride sang this song a few years back. No one really knows the story of this child, or many more like her, but the thought of going through life, however long it may be, and being abused, it is so troubling to me. Abuse is a game of Satan, it eats those victims alive, it mars and scars them , and often, no one sees the scars or ugliness.

Oh people can assume, or after something happens and it is known this person is a victim, then we can look in our rear view mirrors of life and say- I should have seen it, I should have known. May you rest in peace , oh little one, and may the gates of heaven and the golden streets, take away all your pain.

And please, if you think there is a child in need, do not turn away, call and leave a tip on a hot line or to the police. Love and peace, Cindy

Mrs Justa and never claiming to be MR Justa...

43 Things Tags: depression,anxiety,overwhelmed,Mark,disappointment

I was reading some of the blogs of friends Mark had encountered during his blogging days and on one there were some comments posted that referred to Mark's blog and that "I took it over".  I must admit I was hurt, maybe disappointed in the misinterpretation of my intent of writing on this blog. I am unaware how many of you have ever dealt with SEVERE depression, the kind that sucks your energy out, the kind that makes every day seem worthless, the kind that makes a person not care about a darn thing. Well when Mark hit low, I knew he had blogging friends so I thought I would post on what was going on, I guess I was doing it because I thought people cared about what was happening.And I truly believe that some have appreciated it.

I did it so that once MR Justa ( Mark) felt he was able to jump on, you would already know what had happened in the past months. In doing this, there have been some people who have continued to comment, and as soon as I see a comment I thought I was posting it. There are people who have commented that I felt a bond with, because they are so real, so sincere.

I have NEVER screened comments or chosen not to post them. I do however not get on line every day. My job takes me away from home 12 - 13 hrs a day. I manage about 20 people and often have things I bring home with me to do.

I have a house to run, a husband who is healing , a dog, cat and parakeet, and now a new grandson. Life is so busy for me. We have just moved into a new place and there have been a lot of things I have had to help out with, if not do myself. Marks depression and very low state caused him to be admitted 2 times in patient, so along with the hrs I worked, I too had the 50 mile one way trek to the hospital every day. And I would not change anything I have had to do.

I never meant to disappoint anyone, and for the person who commented the "something is just not right"- well I gotta agree with you,our life here has not felt right for a very long time. I can not possibly every expect to be Mark on line, again that was not my intent. I am not versed on bi-polar--- so referencing this site for bi-polar right now is probably not a great reference. Marks doc says he has depression and anxiety disorder and not bi-polar--- I do not know. I used this photo because it represents the void that is felt by him not posting, and again, I will post, but it is not to "take over" Mark's site, it was because I love him, and he really worked hard to make this site what it was, so my intent was to give it some oxygen, to keep it alive, until one day he begins to feel alive again too.

Mrs Justa Believing there is a plan

43 Things Tags: Plan,God,blessings,trials,hurt,belief,faith

There was a song

I used to sing at church called "I Believe" And some of the lyrics were:

"I believe for every drop of rain that falls a flower grows......

I believe above the storm the smallest prayer can still be heard....

Every time I hear a new born baby cry, or touch a leaf , or see the sky,

Then I know why I believe......."

Is this not the utmost truth.

Life is not something that just happens, it is a miracle. Whether it is the garden that blossoms, the vegetables that grow tall from a small packet of seed, the child that is born. This does not just happen as a freak of nature.
I believe there is a plan for each of us, for everything. I believe that we need to appreciate what we have been blessed with. I believe in God and I believe the is a reason for everything.

I believe when there is a time

that hurt knocks on our door of life and weighs heavy on our hearts, that eventually we will see what was in the plan , why did whatever happen?

I look at our grandson in this picture,

this little bundle of joy, so close yet so far away, as he lays in an intensive care unit, being cared for by health professionals when his parents are not there, and health professionals an alarm sound away when his parents are there. We will know why this all happened at some point. I can not say why right now. I have thoughts, but they are just thoughts.

Why is everything not great and rosy?

Why are the winters so harsh? Why are there divorces? Why are there injuries?

I am always looking for what good came out of something bad, something terrible. Sometimes it can be a long time before we can see it, but it is there.

So sleep tight little Brandon,

and continue to get strong. And for everyone who is going through tough times, look beyond the tough area, look for a glimmer, a tiny ray of sun, look inside yourself for the hidden strength, for without hurt the heart is hollow- and I for one can testify, by heart has gotta be far from hollow.

Peace, faith , and believing in good things are wishes I have for you. Love, Mrs Justa, filling in for the slowly healing Mr Justa :)

Mrs Justa and a peek at the special boy

43 Things Tags: Brandon,baby,grandparents,life,blessing

Now tell me he does not look comfy! This is Brandon, our new grandson. We have not yet been formally introduced, cuz the lil guy came into the world 6 wks early. But here he is. He may get out of the intensive care area next week, but we are not sure. Jeff and Amanda are going up to see him as much as they can. He was born this past Tuesday.

So now we are Mr and Mrs Granjusta I guess. Life is so precious, babies are such a blessing, and life is so very unpredictable. I am working on some cloth books that I am trying to bring back to life right now, Jeff had washed them and they got a little misshapen, So I am off to be grandma repairing the babies books.

But I wanted to do a quick blog- to show you our new member to our family :)

Mom and dad are good, and Brandon.. he will be just fine. Love always, Mrs Justa

Mrs Justa and the morning workout

Day one of my journey and Satan did not win! Nope I hopped on this bike, in my jammies this morning and rode for 15 minutes. It was about 5:20, so I did not have a really long time, but it did feel good. I will shoot for tomorrow and the tread mill:) It was a good feeling, tough, but good. Work is chaotic right now , to say the least, so I think the extra working out will help the stress level.

I am probably going to try to alternate every day for now. And I am thinking about trying to walk the whole road we live this weekend. That has gotta be about a 2 - mile adventure.

I am also going to update some photos of the landscaping outside, I think it looks pretty good for folks on a very tight budget.

I do love it here, it is quiet, it is spacious, it is home.

May you each find a place that brings you comfort, whether it be a house, an apartment, a room, it makes no difference, it is a place that is for relaxing, it can be a park bench, or a lounge chair, a tub, just somewhere to take time for you, each of us deserve that. Love, Cindy--- Mrs justa.

43 Things Tags: excercise,goals,work,stress,relaxation

Mrs Justa and unattainable goals

"Just love me with all my faults, as I love you.

Accept me for what I am,

Accept me for the things I do "

 

This was lyrics from a song , I am unsure what song it was from though.

Is that not what we all want. TO be accepted for who and what we are?

I can never be beautiful in the eyes of Hollywood, and I will never be a size 4 or 6. I know what my limits are. But one thing that I know is that my son , my husband, our dog and cat, my brothers and sisters , and all my family, they love me for who I am.

They never make me feel subconscious of my looks, that comes from my inner self. I want to be prettier, I want to be shapelier, I want to be something I will never be. And that is not healthy, because my wants are unobtainable, and with that I make my life a failure before I even get started.

I try to lose weight, I try to look good, I try to wear clothes that are attractive on me, but I do not succeed to the level I want to be at.

I hope starting tomorrow I can get up 20 minutes earlier and hop on the tread mill or bike, and the next day on the other, and try it for 1 month. My wish for you is you make your goals real, do not be like me, for if you are, you set yourself up for disappointment before your feet hit the floor each morning. Love, Mrs Justa

43 Things Tags: goals,self worth,wishes

Mrs Justa and the ocean

The ocean,

43 Things Tags: ocean,peace,life

(courtesy of picsexplained.blogspot.com)  I gotta tell you it is one of my favorite places to be. I think we are born in places that our hearts long for if we ever leave them. I was born in Bridgeport Ct in the early 50s, and I really love New England. There is so much to see in a little bit of travel time. I did go back to New England for a few months, worked in Enfield Ct and lived in Springfield, Mass. It only took 15 minutes to get to work, but I was in a different state. I liked the fact that in 1 1/2 hrs I could be in the mountains or walking along the ocean.

I found the folks from New England an easier folk,

I do not think where I lived that people even knew what stress was, I was the mad dasher from New York, the supervisor who worked along the others, and everyone thought because I was from New York that meant NY City. Well, NY is much bigger then just NYC, I am in upstate NY, we have farms around us, smell manure when the wind blows just right, an acre of lawn to mow, and 6 miles from the nearest big store.

It is nice here,

but my heart is at the ocean and mountains. For it is at the ocean and mountains I am reminded how insignificant I am in the whole scheme of life. I realize how much power there is around us that we have no control over. For those of you by the ocean, talk a deep breath of the sea breeze for me, and for those near a mountain, go for a walk and feel the crisp air, and watch the stars at night, uninterrupted by civilization. Peace to all, Good Night, Cindy

Mrs Justa and her first car

Okay , so now I will sound like my grand parents or my parents. Back in 1971, ( yes there were cars back then) I borrowed $500.00 from my older brother and his wife and bought my first car. It was a 1965 checker limousine, I kid you not. This was an old airport limousine taxi that was sold to me from Magari's Sunoco station -  I painted ( with spray paint) over the "airport" and changed it to the Smiling Limousine. I had yellow on the doors and then I painted big smiley faces, one in the trunk and one on the hood.

In the inside there was a seat in the way back, a folding seat in the middle that folded forward , a middle seat that folded up and a hug bouncy bench seat in the front. It's back door swung open the length of 2 doors, and you could fold the middle seat up so that one could sit in the way back seat and stretch your legs way out. The floor space was actually big enough that I used to say I would put a water bed in it.

Oh I loved that car, on the ceiling I had posters, and I would have sticks of incense cranked in the windows. I would sometimes pick up 10 to 12 friends, and we would go to a place called the Scene East in Syracuse and dance till the lights went out. I was the designated driver- so to speak, so I would dance but stay sober.

Oh what fun we have in our days of first cars. This car had a personality, it had a sense of affection, it was filled with memories and senses of wonder. I was a good girl, had platonic relationships, that made life fun. Getting intimately involved with guys was just not the thing to do, because once it went to intimacy than it became a commitment . It was so much fun to have fun, and just enjoy each other. No strings except the ties of friendships.

It was a good time, back in the 70's. I earned $1.35 per hr as a waitress, and paid my brother back $25.00 a week.

But ya know what, I loved that car, loved that my brother trusted me to borrow the money, and loved my life.

I hope this brings out some happy memories to you too. Love, Mrs Justa

43 Things Tags: first car,memories,friends,good times

Mrs Justa on time

43 Things Tags: time,life,seconds,moments

I once heard someone say that time must be used as a tool and not a couch. That made me think about what I do with time.

Do I take it for granted- I think I do. Do I appreciate every second given to me for my life- I think not. Before I know it my hour glass will be on the empty side of life, and what regrets might I have? What accomplishments will I have been able to say I have done.

That is a soul searching train of thoughts that I have over this one. I know I have written before and I think it all the time that this second will never be again. But thinking it and acting on it are 2 entirely different things.

I think there is a lot I have not done,that I wish I had. I have have these moments of looking at the younger people around me and envying the time they have left. I watch there accomplishments and am glad for them but in the same token it makes me aware of all the time I couched it instead of built with it.

I have not praised God as much as I should, I have not spent quality time as often as I have wanted with my family, with my friends. I have not taken time for me and Mark to enjoy life. I never went after a singing career and wished I had, I never got to stay thin, something I long for even today, I never wrote some letters that I wished I had, never wrote the book I wanted to, never entered photo contests. I must start.

My wish for you is that time as it passes does not get abused on a couch, go for your goals, seek what you are seeking, and live life. Love Cindy

Mrs Justa and the abandoned home

43 Things Tags: family,life,misfortune,loss

We have driven by this house

a number of times on our trek to the new home. It caught my eye the first time we went by, and now every time I go by it I am intrigued by it. I can not totally say why, but it makes my mind wander to days of yesteryear. In the lower window, blocked by the ferns that have consumed it, in that window is a sticker that people used to put on a pane of glass to tell the fireman that a child was sleeping in that room.

In this upstairs room, is a shade that is pulled back by the various forces within.

I wonder about the memories

in this house? Who lived there, how many children? Was it a family that was together? Or a broken home? I picture in my mind that it may have 3 bedrooms , probably one bathroom, and a dining room, living room and parlor type.

And the people, I wonder-did they love each other? Did they have dinner together? Did they read bedtime stories and sing lullabies to the children as they drifted off to sleep?

And then I wonder what happened?

At one point this home was new, the roof strong, the walls freshly painted, and windows sparkling with window covers -whether they be shades or drapes. Someone swept these floors and vacuumed the carpets, mowed the yard, maybe gardened and maybe had a dog or a cat. What made them give up? What caused them to leave? It does not look like a fire, it just looks abandoned. The building to the right, I think it might have been a garage. It might have been sideways on the land.

Now the weirdest thing

is right behind this home, I mean right behind it , is a single wide mobile home, a very old one that has also collapsed from neglect, from no one living in it and loving it. So then I wonder, did the people who built this home, did they live in the single wide while they were building this home? And if they did, what an accomplishment they must have felt to have built this home.

I just can not let this go,

I wonder where the people are now who know the stories of this home. Where are the children that once filled this home with the pitter patter of their little feet, the giggles and the sleepy tears.

I hope they individually and together

have as strong a foundation as their home appears to have, and I hope that it was not total misfortune that made them leave, but maybe they were transferred somewhere else and the home was left behind.

I hope my home never becomes lost,

abandoned like this one. I pray my home will be filled with the memories , blessings and happy times that a home is meant to be encompassed with. My love to all, and wishes that you will fill your home- wherever, what ever you call home, with joy, peace and memories. Love, Mrs Justa

43 Things Tags: home,family,love,abandoned